Marks and Spencer

The first Marks and Spencer coffee we've had in a while - they've changed all their packaging now so its all less glitzy and more down to earth - brown bags are the fashion these days. This has all sorts of bold claims on the packet - floral, apricot, Jasmine... it would be easier to list what isn't in there. Still - poncy descriptive aside - this is a great, quirky coffee. Firstly it looks so inviting - it's one of those that as you stir it up in your pot it forms a lovely creamy head which looks so appetising. And it lasts even as you pour it into the cup - it almost delivers a cappuccino from a caffetiere. Taste-wise, well, it really is fruity - normal for an east African coffee it's got that zesty citrus taste that cuts through that sleepy Monday morning and gets you where you want to be. It seems to be lightly roasted - the colour in the cup would encourage anyone to drink it - unlike some, that although taste good, do look as unappetising as a vat of old sump oil. The only downside is you can't really knock this one up too strong - if you over do it the zesty lemons turn to lead balloons and it's like sucking on a handful of pocket change. Overall, a great and one to serve to the uninitiated who will be impressed that you know what your doing with your plunger. 9/10

Despite all the bold claims on the back of the packet that this is "Bursting with delicious citrus notes" it's not quite true. OK it does have a lemony twang to it - but somehow it just tastes a bit cheap - like stirring a spoon of Lift into an averagely drinkable coffee. It's still nice enough, and the coffee taste hangs around in your mouth after you've glugged it. But in the end, the citrus twist just isn't enough to elevate this thing. Maybe it's because it's a strength 3 which us judges cannot cope with. If this had a bit more grunt, it'd be there. So, if you want a kiddie-level introduction to Kenyan Coffee, this one will probably do you well - it's rated a 12A, or a (6/10)

We picked up two M&S'ers at the same time and the other one - the Luxury Italian - was bleedin' awful. Because this one looks so similar, in our heads, this one was  going to be shonky as well. But hang on!! We were wrong!! This one has a real citrus twist to it  - even the ground beans smelt a bit like a lemon farm. Tasting it too, the first thing you get is the slightly citrus taste more usual with those high altitude east African coffees - we've not had this taste in a South American one before. The follow through gulps are smooth and sweet - and the end effect is you just want more. The only criticism this judge could possibly make was maybe it's not quite strong enough. If this was a strength 5 it would be a 10/10, but as it stands, it's a 9/10.

This is not just Luxury Italian Coffee. It's fucking awful Luxury Italian Coffee. This one claims all sorts on the packet - but forgets to mention lack of flavour and all round general weedy-ness. This is only marginally better than instant - if someone offered it to you at their house you would be grateful that it least is was real coffee, but it wouldn't be worth the effort of making it yourself, you may as well spoon up a Nescafe and save yourself the bother - and disappointment. The final inch in the cup really sealed it - a bitter nasty mess. This Judge's summing up: starts disappointing, ends badly. Gets a 4/10.

We've cracked - it's only mid November and we've been suckered in to this Christmas Coffee from M&S. In theory, we should love it - it should be totally over the top and over indulgent. Don't waste your time - it  isn't! There's more flavour in a bucket of reindeer's milk. It's just totally lacking uuumph. We immediately spooned it up a notch for the second cup and that made no difference either. This is meant to be a strength 4 - but it's more like a 2. It's not horrible though - it's the kind of just-about-ok-coffee that you might get made when visiting a friend's house. If you don't want to be over powered, if you like mellow, then you may well like this. Otherwise, it's a no no. 5/10

This is a real bad boy. It's ground super espresso fine, which means it's very hard to get your weights and measures right. So much so, the first two of these we had were as fierce as a Tiger with it's manhood in a vice. Don't go near it. But despite the skull cracking power, the underlying taste still came through. We knew that deep down this was a good 'un. But it took three failed cups to get the dosage right before we finally got the taste of the real deal. And let me tell you, it's a trooper. One of those coffees that can take any amount of milk without becoming too sickly. It would probably make a good Latte, if you're that way inclined. Once again though with the M&S'er, the difficulty in getting it right is the only thing to detract from a top score from this Judge...9/10

    Arriving at the office first thing on a Monday morning we find that the carpets have been cleaned over the weekend. Now they didn't seem that bad last week, but the assault on the nose this morning was like the Charge of the Light Brigade armed only with lemons. It seems that if you run out of carpet shampoo, Lemsip makes a good alternative. This coffee is claiming a "fruity acidity" - yet this morning everything has a fruity acidity. This is not a good neutral environment for a Judge. So it comes back out over the next few days - and it proves tricky to get right. Even though were sure we make it exactly the same each time, one is foamy, one is heavy and dirty tasting and one is even light and creamy. How can it vary this much? The final one though comes good. There's plenty of depth of flavour and no after taste at all. But still no sign of the fruit. Not one I'd rush out and buy again, but perfectly fine. (6/10)

    This is a first - we had this one first thing and now we've had it again in the afternoon. The reason? It's a little beauty. Marks and Spencer have done us proud here with a rich tasting brew that lingers on the tongue as you swallow it down. It packs a meaty punch - it's a proper strength 5 for sure. Why aren't there more strength 5s about? It's not cheap though - I paid about £3.50 for this which puts it in the middle ground. This is coming in with a top score - only dipped down one point because there was no standout single quality to mention. Although the grind is perfect for the caffetiere - no sludge AT ALL left in the cup - that's a first! Judged at 9/10