Taylors

This is a big one for us as Judge Towers - it's our 200th coffee review, and if there's one thing we've learnt over the years of coffee supping, it's that the more you have, the harder it gets to distinguish between them. There aren't 200 different coffees out there really - despite what the packets may tell you. So we do feel for these marketing people (slightly) who have to think of new metaphors and waffle to try and make their brew stand out. Berries, nuts, notes, caramel et al - they're tried every trick in the book. But Taylors have come up with a new angle - it's not about the coffee, but who grows it, which in this case, is the laydeeez. Peruvian ladeeez in-fact. Which the cynic in me might think ah well, whatever. But on reading the blurb on Taylor's own website it's hard not to feel slightly touched by the whole thing and to want to go and give the folks at Taylors a pat on the back. The coffee itself, thankfully, is a great brew. Everyone who walked past when the packet was open could smell it, and wanted one - it's that aromatic. And yes - it does taste chocolaty as their blurb suggests and we would also add the word velvety. It's also an easy one to make right every time - basically you can't really go wrong with this one. So we suggest you go and get some. 9/10

This kind of tells you that Taylor's extended "it goes up to 6" strength scale only really has 4 grades, as this is graded a 3 and there can't be anything weaker. It almost tastes like one of those perverted "hazlenut" concoctions - sickly and insipid. This should be reserved for young children and old ladies. The lowest judge rating so far - 3/10

Made with four spoons rather than five – why? – who knows. The result though felt like a five spooner – dark and strong. There was big contrast between the pale froth and the super dark coffee beneath which just made you want to pick up that mug and get your face in it. Next time we’ll try a five spooner  and see if we can survive it. Judges Rating - 7/10

Chocolaty and bitter. Every cup from this packet delivered on every count. Usually you’ll make one bad brew from a packet, but the Lava Java covers up any school boy errors you may make with your plunger, turning you into a coffee making guru with ease. We don’t think this one will be beaten… Judges Rating: 10/10

Our love affair with coffee all started with Taylors a few years back with their legendary Hot Lava Java which was the first strength 6 coffee we'd come across. But then a few others jumped on the strength 6 band wagon - so Taylors have hit back now with the first ever strength 7. From the get go when you open the packet you know this stuff is going to hurt - it's dark and pungent - you can almost feel the fumes rolling out over the top of the packet and onto the floor, killing everything in its path.  So we made the first cup with kid gloves – not wanting to overdo it and cause imminent heart failure to any of the four takers. The result:  its bark is worse than its bite. This is a really drinkable brew and actually really easy to get right - we tried plungers and filters and it all came out spot on. Our verdict then - we love it. Try it. Don't be put off by it's hard as nails packaging. It's a 9/10 - only really dropping 1 point as it doesn't have any unusual flavours in there - its just a regular brew. 

The blurb on this one spouts on about blackcurrants - and for once it's not too much of an exaggeration. There is a definite fruitiness in this – although when we spooned it up to make a strong one it tasted more like blackcurrants forged from bronze. But at normal strength this one looks and tastes good – in the caffetiere it was a lovely nutty brown with a head on it like a pint of Guiness. A good brew - anyone you serve this to will like it. 8/10

A limited edition Taylors - one of our favourite coffee makers. This is a good one - easy to get right, and fully of zesty flavour whether you make it strong or weak. The first one we had was weakish, but the tangy-ness really shone through, so we spooned it up and then up again until we had a right face smasher. Even at that strength the quirkiness was still evident, nibbling away at your tongue. Maybe it lost a little finesse at higher dosages - it did start to give the slightly metallic taste on the back of the tongue, so I don't think it wants to go any stronger. It's an 8/10.

We can't knock this one just for being half strength can we? It does clearly say it's half caffeine on the side of the packet. For a coffee that's been through an industrial process, it's still got a lot of flavour and you wouldn't really know it had been mucked around with. It starts fine enough too - but as you get further down the cup, the lack of punch starts to grate. Eventually it becomes a bit sickly with the taste of the milk over powering the content. But that's because we like our coffee strong - so this coffee is actually delivering what it says it would. For most people it's probably a 7 or 8 score, but for this judge only a 6/10.

Coarsely ground this came out fighting from its corner. A real heavyweight - and you'd expect it to be, being called an "espresso". Of course we had a whole mug of the stuff, not four drips in the bottom of a poncy "cup" that would look more at home on a doll's house table. It is bitter - might be more to do with our grinding technique again as the mug was full of powder - this wasn't a liquid - more of a semi-solid. Still, we like that on a Friday afternoon. Whether it will help with my current headache is open to question. This one is said to be made of four different beans - is that by design or from sweeping the roasting house floor? Who knows - it's a high scorer whatever. I'd have given it a 9/10, but I have to peg it down 1 for the ball-ache of having to grind the bugger ourselves. Taylors: that's YOUR job.

It's a strength 3 and it's early afternoon. We're risking it here, but that's how we live life down these parts... on the edge. We did 6 spoons for three cups and it came out looking very caramelly. I was dreading the first mouthful - but it was kind of OK. They claim "citrus" on this one - which in my world is a by-word for "utter-bollocks". The trouble is that this thing gets weaker as you go. As your buds adjust, that first initial mini-hit diminishes to nothing and I felt as though I've ended up with mug of milk. A five year choir boy could punch harder than this one. Needs redoing with a few more spoons. Rated 4/10.